We just finished a day of mom’s meeting together for encouragement. Specifically homeschool Mom’s. I like to call it for me. A day of planned encounter. Like a going to church camp. There is an expectancy that God will meet with me, teach me, transform me in more like a moment than the slowness of every day life. On the normal day to day I am starting to see the subtle changes in me. The subtle answers to prayer. I see the progress but it is seriously so small and so slow. I am more of the extremist type. My prayers are sometimes like “God can’t you just change me right now, completely, no need for the process.” But he loves the process and the slowness. Drawing me to repentance with his daily, moment by moment kindness. “I see you. I am doing this. You can trust me” kind of process.
I am honestly starting to accept and appreciate the slowness of his work in my heart and life. Its like losing weight slowly. IT stays off easier. The slow work God is doing in my life is incredibly valuable. And so necessary. It is completely an answer to my prayers. “God help me love my children. Help me love my husband well. Help me not say horrible things. Help me love my friends. Help me love people I do not understand better.” These are the day to day. Moment by moment things. The dishes, the laundry, the legos, the toy everywhere. The serving and wanting to complain. These are the things He is working in my heart and I almost can not even see it. As I yield to the Holy Spirit in these simple yet often hard things I can see His work in me. Tiny little movements of my heart.
Oh but I do love the encounter. Being changed in a moment. The aha that shifts something quickly. The breakthrough. On my face crying out the Lord, asking Him to move and then suddenly He speaks and something changes forever. I love those moments! What grace! I can not even tell you how many altar calls and ministry times, how many instant moments I lived by at church camp or CIY conferences as a teenager. I have always loved the presence of God. Even before I understand much about it! The spirit fell often at our Christian Church (non-denominational) church camp! I would be weeping in my seat and the next thing you new the whole row was wailing! God would move and we would all get to the altar and just weep there and God would touch us. It wasn’t even a spirit filled space. I didn’t even honestly know the Holy Spirit BUT God isn’t stressed about that!
I believe in and love these moments of encounter. BUT, in it I feel a weight of responsibility. His special grace has fallen and changed you in this moment. Now you get to walk it out. Whatever you repented of, start now to make habits/changes to not go back to that thing. The instant transformation requires partnership! God will honor your part if you honor yours! Today, they did not have any altar calls but I went up front anyways. I found a little spot and I got on my face (during the break) and talked to GOd. And guess what? HE met me! He moved on my heart. He talked so loudly to me. I repented of saying NO to Him on a few things and He lifted a burden in my heart. It was sweet! Just like old times! But I had to plan it. I bought a ticket this this mom’s day, I drove here, I sat through the teaching (which was inspiring) and I bonded with some friends. But then I had to answer the pressure in my heart. I had to say yes to “come away” with my Beloved one. To listen to the Holy Spirit and repent of my kicking and screaming ways!
It was the best of “planned encounters!” It was clear and powerful and so needed! I am so thankful and somewhat inspired to do it again! Set a date, run to the altar! Its nice to have an invitation. But make your own if you don’t have one. God is waiting with open arms to receive you! His love is home to me. His love is my safety. I am nothing with out Him!