As a little girl I started singing at church when my mom put me up front with the microphone in one hand and the hymnal in the other. I tried to learn piano but it didn’t completely stick. But singing was one of my absolute favorite things to do. At church, a telethon, school choir, youth group, in my room, or walking down the street there always seemed to be a song in my heart. When I was 25 I finally started learning to play the guitar. It was rough and ugly but it was fun to have something I wasn’t good at added to the voice God had gifted me with. He did all that work and I was not prepared for how hard it would be to figure out adding an instrument!
Within that year something would happen to me that would make the ability to write songs with my guitar so essential. My mom was in a tragic car accident. In a moment she was gone and my life would be changed forever. This event tested my faith, my ability to hear God, and my motivation for doing most anything! I felt in my heart to try and sing everyday no matter what. I couldn’t think of a more painful way to grieve. Just the act of singing while I was in that season of pain took every part of me. But I did it. I took verses from the Bible and let the melodies flow.
The next two years seem like a blur but somehow I landed at a ministry that focused on worship and prayer. The commitment was two hour sets many times a week. If playing for two hours straight won’t make you a better guitar player or worship leader I am not sure what will. During that time my confidence began to rebuild and my heart began to heal. My favorite parts of these two hours were the spontaneous songs that we sang. I loved singing from God’s perspective and really enjoyed singing prophetic songs over people sitting in the room or on our worship team. I can’t tell you what it does to your heart to just hear God say “I love you and I am proud of you!” But to also hear it sung over you, it changes things!
These songs all came out of that season of learning how to sing the Bible and heal my heart. One morning I woke up and heard a song in my heart. I heard so clearly the Lord sing over me “With you my beloved one, I’m taking my time. I’m not in a hurry, I’m not in a rush. With you my beloved one, I’m taking my time.” It was so clear I hurried to sing it to myself and figure out the chords. It was such a marked experience that as I was figuring out the music the rest of the song came to my heart as well. “And when I am finished, I’ll let you know. With you my beloved one, I’m taking my time.” There is so much more I could say about this song and why those specific words meant so much to me but I will save it for another day. Basically these songs and many others saved me from the depths of despair. Just singing saved me from the hardest season of my life and it continues to save me. In every season a song arises in my heart. When I think about releasing this CD I think about how this is just the beginning. There are so many more songs to be sang and so much more praise to give back to God for all that He has done in my life. This is a small offering back to him and I hope it blesses you!